| Author |
Quotes |
| Unknown | A father said to his son, "When Abe Lincoln was your age, he was studying books by the light of the fireplace."The son replied, "When Lincoln was your age, he was President.". |
| Unknown | A father was reading Bible stories to his young son. He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." His son asked, "What happened to the flea?". |
| Unknown | A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. |
| Unknown | A five year old boy was sitting down to eat when his mother asked him to pray for his meal. He replied, "Mom we don't have to. We prayed over this last night." His mother had prepared leftovers from the day before. |
| Unknown | A five year old was discussing Noah's Ark with Grandma. Grandma asked, "How many animals went into the Ark?" The youngster replied, "One mail and one e-mail.". |
| Unknown | A flea and a fly in a flue were imprisoned so what could they do? Said the flea "let us fly" said the fly" let us flee" so they flew through a flaw in the flue. |
| Unknown | A French guest, staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room service for some pepper."Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge."Toilette pepper!". |
| Unknown | A friend is one who knows who you are, understands where you have been, accepts what you become, and still gently invites you to grow. |
| Unknown | A friend is someone that won't begin to talk behind your back when you leave the room. |
| Unknown | A friend is someone who dances with you in the sunlight and walks beside you in the shadows. |
| Unknown | A friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart. |
| Unknown | A friend is someone who thinks you're a good egg even though you're slightly cracked. |
| Unknown | A friend to all is a friend to none. |
| Unknown | After all is said and done, more is said than done. |
| Unknown | After hearing two eyewitness accounts of the same accident, you begin to wonder about history. |
| Unknown | After the government takes enough to balance the budget, the taxpayer has the job of budgeting the balance. |
| Unknown | An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor. "Doctor, I just can't get to sleep at night." "Have you tried counting sheep?" "That's the problem - I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it.". |
| Unknown | An adolescent is a person who acts like a baby when they aren't treated like an adult. |
| Unknown | An angry person is seldom reasonable, a reasonable person is seldom angry. |
| Unknown | An Apple a day keeps the doctor away.But . . . an onion a day keeps everyone away. |
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